Split.

Clothes were strewn on the floor. The guitar in the corner had a crack in its neck, its strings not as stretched and taut as they used to be. There used to be a pick that made its home in between those strings. Now in its place were cobwebs from yesteryear. There were books. Stacks and stacks of books lining the side of the bedpost, untouched. The patches of floor that were empty were quickly covered in piles of forgotten assignments and balls of paper which held unfinished paragraphs, too complicated to be completed.

A small, single-sized bed emerged in the middle of the chaos that now consumed the room. The bed seemed very much like an island, with its green sheets and green pillowcases. The middle of this island was a dome that raise and fell rhythmically. There were cracks in this dome. Peeking between these cracks was a tuft of black hair, long calloused fingers. 

There was a loud rap on the door. No answer. Another. No answer. A soft hand reached for the doorknob and turned it. The door gave way to a scrawny young man of 20. His flaxen hair glimmered in the sunlight that penetrated through the curtains. 

"Ryan?" he said softly, walking as carefully as one would walk through a minefield. He avoided all the broken  pencils, crumpled papers and the spilt ink cartridges on his way to the bed. Success. He tugged at the blanket slowly to reveal a young man curled up in fetal position with his eyes scrunched shut in attempt to block out all particles of sunlight that tried to pierce their way through his emerald irises. 

Looking at this man was like looking at the mirror. The two men looked exactly the same except for a few things like the colour of their hair and the tattoos that ran up and down the raven-haired man's arms. 

"Ryan, you've been asleep for quite some time now. Time to wake up." the flaxen-haired man whispered in Ryan's ear. Ryan turned to face him slowly. His drooping eyelids gave way to green irises.

"But, Nicky. I -"

"You haven't been drinking. So don't tell me you're hungover, Ry. Get up."

"Yes, Mom."

Nicky held out a hand and Ryan took it in his own, pulling himself up. He took one glance at his room. The broken printer, the ink cartridges, random bits of stationery, blobs of ink on crumpled pieces of paper. Ryan felt overwhelmed. He let go of Nicky's hand and fell back onto the bed. 

"I can't do this Nicky. I don't think I'll graduate on time like this. You go ahead. Graduate. Get married. Have kids. I'll just be right here." he mumbled into the nearest pillow. 

Nicky smiled at his twin brother. 21 years in, Nicky understood his brother's habits and moods, how he functioned, what made him tick. Being by his brother's side this long, Nicky knew that it was not in Ryan's nature to be the serious type. Ryan was the type to have fun. Actions came first, consequences came later. Way later. To Ryan, his life was a big puzzle. The pieces of the puzzle may not necessarily fit in the right spot at the right time - but all pieces will fall into place - one day. 

Nicky, on the other hand, has always been Ryan's polar opposite. Nicky spent his days in lecture halls, his evenings in libraries and nights studying himself to sleep. Nicky was the proactive type. He had his life planned out ahead of him. His planner had tabs in every box, telling him what had to be done, what had to be submitted. He always read his notes ahead of classes, always handed in his assignments and always made sure his brother's assignments were finished on time, even if that meant that he had to do them instead.

Being the responsible one, he also always made sure that Ryan was up to speed on the classes he missed out on the days he was terribly hungover or too lazy to make it class. He made sure that Ryan's CGPA never dropped below 3.5, ever. Why? Nicky had promised for them to graduate - together - at the top of their class. He intended to keep that promise, no matter how hard it was.

"Ryan. Get up."

"The world doesn't need me." Ryan mumbled deeper into a pillow. Nicky sighed and tugged at his arm.

"Yes they do. Get up, Ry. I'll make you breakfast and I'll do your laundry."

Ryan gave in to his brother's words and got off the bed. 

"Will you clear up this mess and fix my printer too?" Ryan replied sleepily as he stretched out his arms. 

"Don't push your luck, Ry. Now go get dressed. Scott and Elle are waiting for us at the library. They'll be helping you with your literature review and stuff. And you know how Elle doesn't like waiting."

Ryan smiled. He could picture Eleanor fuming about how the he was always late to their little study sessions. He trod past the pieces of stationery and balls of paper to get to his cupboard. He lazily picked out an old worn-out pair of jeans and his favourite Mannschaft jersey. Looking in the mirror, he laced his raven hair with hair gel, spiking it up. He noticed the dark circles that were beginning to show. 

He grabbed the satchel hanging by the cupboard door and slung it across his chest. The satchel was covered in button badges he had collected over the years. With nothing but a single notebook in the satchel, the buttons bumped against each other, giving off soft clicking noises.

"Ready?" Nicky asked, looking up from the laundry basket he had been carrying around the room.

"Yup, I think I'm ready."

"Come on."

Ryan laced on his chucks and out the door he went. 

"Nicky?"

"Yes?"

"How do you take control of everything? Classes. Dissertation writing. Mom." He paused a moment before adding in a quiet "Me?"

"I don't. I'm only human, I can't control things, but I try my best at controlling myself. Other things just fall into place I guess. It always has." 

The two boys were silent. The only sounds heard were the clickety-clack of Ryan's button badges clicking against each other and the sound of their shoes against the cobble floor.

"I'm never going to make it through to graduation Nick." Ryan said, breaking the silence. 

"Yes you are."

"How are you so sure?"

"Because you're Ryan. You have a 3.7 CGPA. You are President of the student body. Kids love you. Lecturers see something special in you. And you're my twin brother. That's how I know for sure, that you'll be able to graduate on time. We will kick ass at this dissertation. Promise."

Ryan stopped in his tracks and hugged Nicky from behind. Nicky slowly turned around and returned the favour. He could feel how Ryan trembled silently in his arms, fearing a future that seemed too uncertain for him. So much was expected of him, of his brother. Nicky held him tighter, telling Ryan without words that he would be there every step of the way. 

They were brothers after all. They would make it through. Together.

FIN. 

A/N: I haven't written about these two in FOREVER. I've missed having the two of you around. The two of you complete me. xx